“Dare to drop the perfect and find the miraculous in your everyday life. We are about living courageously right here in the middle of crazy mornings, mounds of laundry-folding, tantrums (ours and our children’s), deadlines, heartaches, and the quietly content moments. How? Cultivating delight, compassion, and connection in our everyday lives.” ~ Lisa McCrohan
I wrote those words awhile back. Today they really resonate with me. Daring to drop the perfect as I have been recouping from an injury. I’ve HAD to drop the need to make things perfect — our home, how I parent, what kind of friend I am, how I am as a leader and therapist. This is HARD!
Yet…it’s in the daring to be IMPERFECT and having the courage to be RIGHT HERE in the PRESENT moment that we exhale and see that our lives are miraculous. Imperfect and miraculous. A precious gift.
And it IS quite daring these days to be imperfect — to not be the perfect parent who responds mindfully every single time her child acts up, to not be everything to everyone, to be vulnerable and in need, to not have it all together at a meeting (or on the playground, for god-sake!).
It IS an act of courage to BE RIGHT HERE instead of scattered in a million different directions never really present to our dear ones, let alone our own hearts and bodies. Social media is great. Iphones rock. But…we can get soooo easily addicted to them (myself included) and get lost in cyberworld instead of RIGHT HERE looking at the snow softly falling, the warm blanket wrapped around you, your child’s eyes filled with excitement telling you a story, nourishing food at your table, a warm house.
But I find that the times when I do just allow myself to be imperfect, I create spaciousness. I literally breathe more easily. I find that when I pause and connect to whoever happens to be in our kitchen, my whole nervous system settles. I find that when I notice the goodness all around me, I rest and I smile deeply.
That’s where I’m at right now…in the middle of breathing that wisdom in, letting it take up residence in my heart and body. Open to the wisdom of being imperfect and cultivating compassion for me and my dear ones…and seeing the miraculous in that.
Where’s the miraculous in your life right now? Can you find it and savor it even in the “imperfect”?
Love to you all, Lisa
Blessings,
Beautiful post, Lisa 🙂 Sometimes when we are going to rough patches, it’s hard to see our blessings or even to believe everything is going to be ok. It’s good to look at the beauty that surrounds us in every moment. Much love to you and your family!
Eline, thank you friend! Your posts and pictures always bring a smile to me — they soften my mind and my breath. Yes, suffering or a “rough patch” just brings us back to what we need. Love to you, Lisa
Great post. Perfection is an illusion because nobody is perfect and it can’t ever be attained. You seem like you are doing pretty good to me! 🙂 Enjoy the ride, perfection is boring anyway. So I hear, I wouldn’t know because I am far from it, but I imagine it would be boring.
you got it, superman! yep, perfection is boring. i think about when i go into someone’s house that is all perfect and put together and i think “wow, where are THEY?” And then when i go into someone’s house that isn’t all put together, I think “ahhhh, this is them!” and i smile. Thanks, Jonathan. You sure do make me smile.
This one resonated with me: ‘It IS an act of courage to BE RIGHT HERE instead of scattered in a million different directions’. It’s like easing away from the tendency to hold on, to adhere, to stick like glue. To get there consciously IS courageous – mostly it’s triggered by extreme situations, takes you by surprise, miraculous. This comment was being posted as your one was coming in! Thanks and I hope you are recovering well…
Yes, releasing (or, well, first being aware of) the clinging, the “holding onto”. Again and again and again I find the truth in how it is my refusing to accept “what is” that causes suffering. When I allow, go with, open to and then respond from that place…there is peace. Yes, to get there is courageous and really…counter cultural (ok well, where I’m living now!). Yes, often brought on by extreme situations…like recouping from this head trauma. Another opportunity to open. And to rest! Yes, i am recouping — two steps forward, one step back, a lot of reorienting to this new “norm”, a lot of humility.
Love, Lisa
Such a wonderful concept to share about ~ allowing ourselves to be imperfect. Ah… yes. A gentle and peaceful sigh, as I feel the spaciousness you mentioned. Thank you Lisa for another excellent reminder to just be present, and notice the blessings all around us. Like you. Bless your heart. With love, Gina
LOVE!!!
I loved this post Lisa.. it is so freeing. To be able to realize the illusion of perfection and let go of that attachment to being something that others want us to be, or we believe we “should” be … I think allows us such a genuine ability to grow and expand consciousness. It is true that when physical limitation ensues, we are often very much forced to let go of this impulse to be “the perfect” … I am thinking of you always and hope this head injury is working its way to complete healing. Sending you so much love and just know how much you are appreciated here always ~ x Robyn
Oh, Lisa, dear one – your transparency is so refreshing! Thank you! Since none of us is capable of perfection, Robyn said it when she used the word “freeing.” It is so freeing to give ourselves permission to be the only thing we can be: imperfect! The challenge is to allow our spouses, children, and friends that same freedom! Hah 🙂 Bless you!!
JAN! Thank you dear friend! I just read this right after i was visiting your blog and commenting on some of your posts! Yes, giving our dear ones the same space to be imperfect! How hard is that?! I am finding that i ease up on my husband and my kiddos and my parents when I am nourishing myself adn tending to myself. when i’m not, when that self-care needs to be back in balance, i am at everybody!!